[My] Life in Wisconsin

Reianna Marie DeGrave- (including my own written memorial to her family)

Reianna Marie DeGrave-
(including my own written memorial to her family)
September 14th, 2006

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Reianna Marie DeGrave
March 10, 1979- September 13, 2006

"Rest in Peace My Sweet Little Girl"

"The Will of GOD will never take you
where the GRACE of GOD will not protect you."

Asleep
in God's beautiful garden
Away from all sorrow and pain
Someday when life's journey has ended
We’ll all be together again.
author unknown
Reianna as always a 'daughter'; as I was Dennis 2nd wife.
Not from under my heart, but forever in it...

Here now, is a copy of my own little memorial/tribute to Reianna...

There are no words... I have been up for the better part of 3 hours already- staring at this screen,

Alone with my own offerings, my own prayers, and my own little thoughts; and with my most wonderful memories of Reianna...

.

.

Susan... Dennis...

I have prided myself on my ability to put myself in other peoples shoes. But I don't think that anything I can even think of would appreciate the pain you are in right now. And there is nothing that can possibly be said to help to lessen that grief for you.

Through you both I have been given the opportunity to love your little girl, and for that I promise to always remain grateful for being entrusted with loving Reianna.

My memories of, and love for Reianna, will both live on always- for my own lifetime and in my own heart...

Daniel...

I cannot even begin to know your own loss and shock. Age not-with-standing, you were always the 'big' brother- and Reianna has always had your constant, abiding and faithful love and support. That is what 'family' is all about. Having you to count on, to "step up to the plate" now with respect to the babies, meant the world to your sister- and meant PEACE to her soul as well. Your love for her and her's for you will live on in you always.

Zoe... Jennifer... Roberta... CaseyAnne...

Sometimes knowing that love offered, taken, given and shared, is enough in its entirety to hold onto for a lifetime. It is not how long we are here to love, but rather how well and how very much we love for the time that we are here.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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Once upon a time I had met this beautiful, bashful, quiet, 'wouldn't eat beans' little girl. While she did learn that those beans would not harm her, I respect that Reianna had many other fears besides those damnable beans...

As a small girl, she was prone to throwing her tantrums- almost comedic in retrospect... Pitching herself to the floor, (no matter where we were)- and screaming something fierce. After a while, we did learn to just walk away- but this too took time, and broke our hearts- Once done though, she never did throw herself to the floor again.

As a 1st grader, Reianna gave all she had to learning how to read- and the effort she put into it was an enormous one. With this effort, came a whole new world that opened up to her.

And she blossomed- and with that, she grew. Going to Parent-Teacher Conferences, the one thing that has forever remained in my heart is her teacher telling us what an exact joy it was to have Reianna in her class because every day she got a world of free hugs; ...and so very much love to look forward to.

This ability to love is Reianna's true spirit. The very same spirit that Reianna tried to hold onto- desperately at times. Most especially as a young adult; if only to find and to keep her own little place in this most ungracious and terribly unforgiving world.

And she overcame so very much in her too-short life... Learning to trust in herself, to have faith in her own soul, and in her own heart were only two of those things.

Learning to love herself as the beautful woman she was, was another.

And through the Amazing Grace of God Reianna found her way to persevere.

And she continued to grow and to learn-

She learned mostly that sometimes she just had to take one baby step at a time- and at others, there were offered those HUGE steps forward.

.

.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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Kain. Makayla. And Michael.

(Reianna's very own huge steps... and her legacy to us all).

.

Michael- at 9 months, still to take his own first baby steps;

Kain and Makayla already in school- and already displaying their own unequalled spirits.

The pain will pass and the good memories and your love for your mother will always live on in the spirits of each of you.

.

.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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.

Again...

Kain...

Makayla...

Michael...

Susan... Mother...

Dennis... Daddy...

Zoe Catherine...

Jennifer Hope...

Daniel Bernard...

Roberta Marie...

CaseyAnne Louise...

May God Bless You All...

Each and Every one..

Not only for today and tomorrow, but may His Blessings sustain your hearts throughout your own lives- until you can all be together again.

My Deepest Sympathies and My Forever Love;

Anne/Ma/Mom

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.

September 14, 2006 4:00 AM

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METHADONE

Please also see 20/20 article: "One Pill Can Kill"

http://abcnews.go.com/2020/story?id=2475616&page=1

Good Morning;

Most of you who are on my friends list here have probably already received my email from this morning- This is a copy of that email then...

Those of you that are lurkers here- or even just passing through

PLEASE TAKE THE TIME TO READ THIS

I have also attached Reianna's entry... including my own little tribute to herself and to her family too....

------------------------------------

here is my email:

Hi all,

Did you have a chance to catch ABC's 20/20 last night? This story had the first spot, a story, (actually many stories) about people who have died taking prescribed dosages of methadone. This is what Reianna took the night before she died...

Please do NOT take this drug for ANY reason!

EVER!

And please forward this on to all of your family and friends too. This knowledge IS that important...

Here is a brief synopsis of their program last night then... One Pill Can Kill http://abcnews.go.com/2020/story?id=2475616&page=1

METHADONE

Killing More Than Pain, Killing Patients

By JIM AVILA and BONNIE VANGILDER

Sept. 22, 2006 — - Pain pills are the new "pocket gold" on the street, so valuable to drug dealers that the neighborhood prescription counter has become the target of routine holdups.

Bandits have been caught on surveillance video jumping over counters, not for cash in the register, but for Percocet, OxyContin, and a new favorite, methadone.

No matter how it is acquired, illegally or by prescription, methadone is now the leading drug killer in many states.

In North Carolina, methadone-related deaths have increased by 50 times in recent years, skyrocketing to more than one death every other day. Cheap and Lethal

Methadone is prescribed more frequently and sold on the street for as little as 25 cents a pill.

Ruth Winecker, a chief toxicologist for the North Carolina Medical Examiner's Office, says methadone is so cheap, insurance companies promote its use.

Often doctors wrongly prescribe methadone for temporary pain, such as a migraine headache, menstrual cramps, or a pulled tooth.

Winecker says the danger with methadone is that it stays in your body for a long time.

About 15 hours after you take a methadone tablet, half of the tablet is still active in your system.

Now autopsy reports are showing that even people who suffer legitimate pain and have prescriptions from their doctors can be at risk. Lives Lost to Methadone

Michael Houston, 17, of Winston-Salem, N.C., lost his life to methadone.

His parents, Terry and Lisa Houston, say he had too many activities on his plate to be a drug abuser.

He was active in church youth groups; played guitar and baseball; and, had an after-school job and a girlfriend.

His father, Terry Houston, remembers that his son was very congested and was not sleeping well at night.

"Someone may have told him, 'Take this [pill]. This will help you rest. You'll get a good night's sleep,'" Houston said.

Houston says his son came home from work one night and went to sleep at around 10:30.

The next morning, he didn't wake up.

He was rushed to the hospital by ambulance and was put on a breathing machine for a day and a half.

Michael Houston was pronounced dead. Terry Houston says the autopsy showed that the only drug in his son's system was about 10 milligrams to 15 milligrams of methadone -- only one pill.Shared Grief

The Houstons are not alone in their sorrow.

Three other North Carolina families have lost loved ones to accidental methadone overdoses.

Eddie Ellis' brother, William Ellis, and Darlalu Craanen's husband, Robert Craanen, both died within a week of starting new methadone prescriptions.

Linda Simmons also lost her daughter, Ronda Wilson, a 34-year-old nurse, who was taking methadone for a bad back.

Simmons says the medical examiner called her to tell her that methadone poisoning had caused her daughter's death.

"One pill can be lethal," said methadone expert Lynn Webster, the president of Utah's Academy of Pain Medicine and a practicing pain-management doctor.

Webster analyzed methadone deaths nationally, and he says that the main problem is with new users.

The drug doesn't kick in right away, so new users are more apt to take more and overdose.

So, Webster says, doctors need to strongly warn patients not to soothe their pain with more amounts of the drug.

"If a doctor prescribes too much medicine, you may not wake up two or three days after you start your prescription," Webster said.

By "not wake up" Webster says he means "die."

Robert Craanen, an electrician with severe migraine headaches, took methadone as prescribed and died four days after starting the medication.

"After he passed away, I counted the days and counted the pills. He had taken the proper amount that was prescribed," said Darlalu, Craanen's wife. "He shouldn't have died."

Then there's Simmons.

Her daughter was a high-risk patient, overweight, asthmatic, and suffering from a chronic cough -- not a good candidate for a drug, like methadone, that depresses breathing.

After taking methadone, Simmons says, her daughter was found dead in her sleep by Simmons' grandson.

"Our daughter was a nurse. She just didn't know what she was taking," Simmons said.

"Even educated people don't understand the devastation this drug can cause or how quickly it can happen." Reacting to Methadone

Strangely enough, there was a warning sign in all these patients before their deaths.

Terry Houston woke up in the middle of the night when he heard his son snoring extremely loudly.

Eddie Ellis says he noticed the same thing before his brother, William, died.

"I could hear him snoring, outside," he said.

Doctors say uncharacteristic snoring is a sign that a patient may be suffering from methadone poisonings.

"We see this constantly. In tons and tons of cases that cross my desk, the patient was snoring, doesn't usually snore, making gargling sounds," said chief toxicologist Winecker.

"Those are all indications that the patient is toxic."

Innocent patients are dead, and many were never warned on their prescription bottles about the tricky nature of taking methadone.

The Houstons say they are angry at themselves that their son is dead.

"Angry for not being awake when he came home that night. … Angry at God for not giving him another chance."

Copyright © 2006 ABC News Internet Ventures

Take care-

With love always, "Anna-Anna"