ARF! (remember that's like ALOHA to you humanoids)
Yup, it's ME again!!!
Anyway... I sure don't feel too good right now; and even 'she' knows this. As I sat on her lap last night, she just hugged me for a while~ But soon as I left the lap, all hell broke loose! And I do mean REALLY LOOSE!!! (And on her floor too)! So last night I was left to my own devices out in the entrance and all alone... This was NOT FAIR!
...And I don't think she will be giving me any more of those new doggie treats she bought either. Bet she'll give 'em to my Mama now. Nothin' ever bothers my Mama; (well, 'cept ME sometimes). Anyway, I guess I'll be stuck with that banana biscotti that 'she' bakes for us doggies.
Maybe I shouldn't say "stuck"~ I do like it, (And a whole LOT)! But sure, I like the treats that come out of the crinkly bags too.
I don't like the bags though; they scare me.
Everytime she goes away without me, she will come in with those noisy, scary, crinkly bags... And so I just watch from afar. 'Cept for earlier this week... It was my 'birthday' comin' up; and I could smell the wonderful smell of a new BONE for me... I crawled closer, and then I could SEE it too! There it was, sittin' right on top of the open bag that she'd left on the floor!!! So I snuck up on it then, real quiet like... I even got it a day early! (She is a such a sucker for a nagging pup)!
...I am a whole 8 months old now ya know! (and FOUR days)!!
Some days, 'she' says I'd better grow up fast; and other days she wants me to be little again. I sure wish she'd make up her little mind... (Not the sharpest pencil in the case)...
I don't know what is happening outside anymore. I used to play and play all day long. I even used ta be able to help my 'she' pull the weeds out because her hand don't work, and I could pull 'em out faster anyway. Now I go out, pee and poo and have to come right back inside cuz my paws get all tingly right away. I think 'she' said "Baby, it's COLD outside."
It was real dusty out there this morning- (even worse than on the inside)!! -and it looked like she was baking outside all night long and that she must have kept spilling stuff. But this new stuff was cold and tingly too.
So yes, I always pee and poo outside- ('ceptin' for last night that is)...
And I didn't mean to make her get mad either. Now I don't really know how 'mad' she was, but I DO remember her hollering "NO!" - and really LOUD too.
Boy, she sure can make a LOTTA noise! No wonder that numb nuts dude was scared of her! Obviously I'm much smarter than him anyway because I know that her bark is worse than her bite! And I know this is true, because she has never ever bit ME!
Back to last night though... After I got sick, she hung up her 'talkie~ringie' thing real fast -
Now try to explain what she did next, wouldja? She then puts me outside saying I could "finish what I started"...
(WHAT)??? gheess-
I had already finished it all ~~~ inside! OOP~OOP (haha, spell that backwards)!
What the heck does she think when that much poo falls out of me? Was she kidding, or what??? Does she really think I can make MORE before I freeze to death out there? (She's not the brightest crayon some days)... She had water in her eyes when she let me back inside though, and it smelled funny in here too. Ha. She only 'thinks' that stuff smells good. But I am a dog, and even us young'uns have these great snouts! (I mean, heck, I found my birthday treat, didn't I)?
I didn't eat at all yesterday, 'cept for a few treats... And when she got up this morning, I wouldn't even go play with my toys when she fired 'em across the room, and up the steps... I lay down at her paws, and just cried a little every now and then. ...Soon as she could she used the 'talkie~ringie' thing and called that nice doctor man. Well, he wanted to see me!!! (I LOVE it when people wanna see me)!!! But I had to go for a ride to go see him, (which was just fine cuz I haven't been eating and drinking anything anyway).
And then, 'she' goes really slow cuz there's that DUST all over the place!!! We finally get there, and there's another nice man sitting on a chair waiting for something. He sez he wants one of my brothers or sisters, but 'SHE' sez she don't know if my Mama will have anymore since we were kinda hard on her and all... He's from a place called Southern California; and said now they live right close to us. He was real nice~ but kinda funny too- He had holey shoes on with socks... She asked him why he had 'sandals' on... Guess he didn't think it was that cold.
He was nice, and then his 'she' and their dog came out of MY room~ I think that doggie was right CUTE, 'cept he growled at me! (The little rat~turd, if I'd have felt better I would have told him I could have eaten him for lunch)... Good thing I wasn't too hungry then...
Then it was MY turn!
I got up on the big flat thing and the Dr. said I was 77.7 pounds. (Not too shabby for a little kid like me, huh)? And then we got to go into my room there. The Dr. stuck something in my butt- He's kinda weird this way, and always does this to me. (It doesn't hurt, but I thought maybe I would have to 'go' but I didn't). He said it was normal at 102.34. (I don't know what that means, something about not having a fever). Then he takes his 'sun' and shines it in my eyes! (Hey I don't like that- It's kinda like when she takes a picture of me)... But the nice lady that came in to help him offered me a treat, (and a really BIG one too). I couldn't resist and I ate it ALL!
Meanwhile, my doctor is rubbing me all over, pushing things- and then he looks in my ears and sez they are fine. (My snout is fine too, remember? but he didn't even look there).
Then he sticks these things in his own ears... She makes me lay down and he puts the other end on my fur. Then he puts it in a different place- This goes on and on and on. This is starting to tickle so I start to wiggle and squirm. Finally he puts it on my tummy too. He asks my 'she' if she has heard any wierd digestive noises. She sez just from her own belly! (haha very funny). And then they laugh, while I'm the one that's sick... Oh, for Pete's sakes!
He asks her all kinds of questions... She tells my secrets, and I'm not sure if I like her so much anymore cuz she told him she caught me with a hairpin in my mouth just the other day. I thought maybe he'd get mad, but he didn't. (And I'm not about to tell them if I swallowed one of them things either)! She asked the doctor about the poison she'd put out for the mouses, (even though she hid it on us doggies in the pallets and stuff). He said it would be much too early for them to know. Guess I wouldn't get sick for about a week... He told her that if I DID do this, then I would have a bloody nose and start to breathe loud. (She asked him if my snoring counted; and they all laughed at me, AGAIN)!
haha very funny...
So anyway, he thinks it could be a bug... Yeah, and I KNOW all about bugs cuz I pound 'em with my paws, and then I eat 'em if I find 'em in the house! So now one must be in my tummy making me feel a little yucky!!! (I'll be pounding and chewing them MUCH better next time)!
OK.
So the doctor gave her another bottle of pills for me and said that I should get better fast. She said the pills are called 500mg 'metronidazole'. (I say who cares what they're called, long as I get better)???
And the best part of the whole thing was that she stopped at the place that smells so yummy. It is next to where the little one used to work. And she got me a meat and bread thing there. I had to smell it all the way home then. She is SO mean sometimes... That is a really long ride when she is going so slow. She kept saying something about the roads and the "SNOW" (So THAT'S what its called)! Finally we get home, go inside... Then, get this, 'she' is so mean that she opens my mouth and actually shoves this pill down my throat! I shook my head 'no' when she had offered it to me. Then she cuts the meat and bread into teeny tiny little pieces and mixes it all up with my regular food... So I ate THAT all too. And I think she heard me drinking a little water too. Maybe I will be better soon.
I wish I could talk though so they could know if I ate something that I shouldn't have- She will be worried now for at least the next week, even though the doctor told her it would be fixable...
After I ate all that, and drank a bit, I got to go outside by my mama while my 'she' shoveled the SNOW from by my door, and my mama's door- and a bunch of other places too. It wasn't so cold when I wrestled with my mama in the sunshine; even if we were rolling in the snow!
I have to go nap now... It was a big day for a little Punkin like me!
A real big "ARF" to everyone!!!!
ARF ARF ARF!
and LOVE too,
"Punkie the Pup"
...and 'member, never tell her any secrets or you'll be sorry!
