I DID IT! (barely)... Anxiety...

Good Morning!

It is raining and/or sleeting... I hear it hit the window here and it even sounds cold; although the temp is hovering aruond 40 degrees out there...

Ok... Here is a topic that I have touched upon in many of my blogs, but never really got into...

I got into town yesterday- (an achievement of sorts for me with respect to my little anxiety thing)... I got a few necessities, and was almost home before the 1/2 Xanax I took wore off... and it is such a sickening feeling when that happens.

Gosh. Crap. (Help)? Does ANYONE else in the whole world have this issue, or am I losing what little was left of my sane? mind to begin with?

Having had this anxiety/panic/ptsd going on for the past about 10 years or so, I cannot begin to tell you how very tired I am of it all... And I just want my life back. (Or even someone elses, doesn't matter), I just want to 'be'.

Yes, I still have all my Christmas shopping to do yet- Perhaps Casey will do that after she gets home from Texas? Jennifer, CaseyAnne and even Roberta have all done grocery shopping for me already- countless times... And I hate the fact that I have always prided myself on being ever so independent for my entire lifetime, and now to be like this...

I have lost much humor about it too... And some days, (way too few and far between), I am the "ANNA-ANNA" I was before... And I think one of the worst things, besides not being able to go to mass, is that fact that I have never even taken Miss Valerie shopping! Guess that is one of the things I used to dream of doing with my grandbabies... among many other things. And it does my heart good to hear what you Folks are able to do on a daily basis too. (Yes, I CAN live vicariously through you)!

And yet, this 'bloggythingie' of mine brings me out, and has brought me friends, and makes me feel good! (Well, 'cept when you holler at me)... But even that makes me feel good!

Yup, weird! (Really freakin' ridiculous if you ask me)...

So anyway, I did get home in one piece, not too much worse for the wear... so I shouldn't complain really- (Home is as nice a place to be as most any other places I have seen)! And yes, I DO know full well that there are any number of worse things that I could be going through, and that many of you are.

While I was in the store yesterday, I even broke down and bought some Christmas cards.

So this is your LAST CHANCE to be sending me your addresses, (should you want me to be having a little fun with my Christmas list)!!! he~he~he ...Just hit the message button though, I am sure you do not care to have your address out there for the whole world to see!

Oh, and yay!, I did hear from the kids too... They got to Missouri- (south central), about 9:30 last night- They got a bit of a late start yesterday morning, and left Green Bay at 8, (instead of the 5 AM that Jenne was originally shooting for)... Casey said they would leave by 8 this morning to be to Texas tonight. I am so happy that they are driving too. One gets to actually "SEE" the country as they go along!

I had better close for now and get to being busier than I have been lately!

Hope you are all having a wonderful Tuesday!!!

XOXO
Anne

Below is the host webpage http://www.artistrue.com/details/Abstract/anxiety.htm with the above image in its original context.