http://www.greenbaypressgazette.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/99999999/GPG0101/399990753/-1/specials01&theme=GPGALCOHOL&template=theme
Please do not read more into this than what is told.
I am not a drinker.
(This is a choice I made, not only for myself, but for my children, a long time ago).
And yet, I am not against drinking. (Nor am I a hypocrite).
I am against drinking to excess, (although at times, as a bartender in various places, I did contribute to that in others, simply by serving them).
Know your own limit.
Take care of yourself, and have enough love and respect for all the others that love you.
XOXO
Anne
~~~~
Do you, or someone you love, drink too much?
The Green Bay Press-Gazette is doing a series on the seriousness of drinking in Wisconsin, (but I think it would apply to everyone, everywhere).
Here you will find an interactive map that shows where your own state is ranked amongst drinkers.
http://www.greenbaypressgazette.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/99999999/WIS0110/399990694/1979
About this series...
The true story of Wisconsin’s unparalleled culture of drinking isn’t found in a bold headline about a drunken driving fatality or a young person drinking himself to death on his 21st birthday, although such tragedies certainly figure into the picture.
It’s a quieter story, one about the very fabric of life in Wisconsin. And it’s about all of us, even those who don’t drink a drop — doctors and lawyers and jurors and counselors and cops and bartenders.
Gannett Wisconsin Media is exploring in human terms the causes and effects and the costs and benefits of the state’s love affair with the bottle.
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"Stay Dry, or Die" is found here...
http://www.greenbaypressgazette.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20080713/GPG/807130352/0/specials01&theme=GPGALCOHOL
A story of a (now) recovering(?) alcoholic.
But if they are only going to portray the aging male in this series, then I am already upset about it all.
The truth of the matter is that so many YOUNG females are also very compromised by the empty promises of the full bottle...
I know this for a fact.
I know this because I love a few of them.
I know this because it affects at least one of my own daughters.
~~~~
Another "label" perhaps.
Maybe too many "labels" that seem to exorcise the realities of the scene.
In my own opinion, we don't need any more labels.
We need personal responsibility. Period. That would be enough.
And this needs to be taught from young, onward, without compromise for maybe, or someday.
"Someday" started a LONG time ago...
~
Amen Sister !
ReplyDeleteIt's almost simple.
ReplyDeleteAnd I laugh at the people that have the audacity to tell me I cannot smoke.
I can do that and NOT kill anyone as I drive down the road anyway.
Difficult to quit? I have tried numerous times... with no real success ever.
So, on THAT level I understand and can sympathize with the addiction aspect.
But when you are driving down the road... with an alcohol induced sense of smugness or confidence, then there HAS to be some kind of responsibility (and brains) involved.
As someone who has been fighting the ''drinking demon'' for most of her life, I can attest to the personal responsibility part. The addiction hit me before I realized it. I do however have enough sense not to drink and drive...if I'm going to drink, I stay the heck home.
ReplyDeleteI've been told that addictions can run in families...my own family would be a prime example of that being so. I don't know if it's true or not.
I do know, that I made the decision to drink and now I have to face the consequences of that decision and take responsibility for my actions.
Having an addictive personality isn't easy and is hell to fight. I know, just ask me.
Does anything I wrote make sense to anyone other than moi? (I'm trying to function without coffee right at the moment...)
I believe this with all my heart.
ReplyDeleteMy birthfather does drink. I always told myself that if I drank to the point of not remembering then I would quit. And that is exactly how it played out for me.
And it wasn't hard for me. (Key words are "for me" there).
Not like the smoking issue I do battle with.
Roberta's birthfather is an alcoholic, although he has never used illegal drugs.
I think my kids all fight their own personal demons with respect to the drink too. Not knowing when enough is enough, or setting their own limits...
I pray lots- as I am sure my own parents did when we would go out for a night of drinking and dancing.
Hang in there Pest.
Your honesty has touched my heart.
XOXO
Anne
Thanks and hugs
ReplyDeletemz. kittycat
ReplyDeleteRight backatcha Sweetie!
I'm not all together convinced. I think actions are learned from your family and your environment, but if you're going to drink that decision is completely yours. My ex-husband has a drinking problem. Neither of his parents drink. None of his grandparents, or immediate family members drink. Most of them didn't believe me when I told them. It was the way he decided to cope with life's difficulties. If he wasn't drinking he was taking valium/pain killers and justifying every bit of it to himself. I'm lucky to say I never believed it. He even blamed it on me at times. If I wasn't putting all kinds of pressure on him, then he wouldn't feel the need to drink. etc etc etc. I've had issues in my own life. Not necessarily addictions, but issues of dependency on people. On men. On money. I'm not an angel. I've been wasted many times. I do not drink anymore. I've seen what it does to people, and to families. I have a small life that depends on only me. I've never found it difficult to do anything for him. I believe saying that it runs in families, is just another justification for the drinker/drug abuser. They don't need any more justifications. (believe me I've probably heard most of them) They need to take personal responsibility. It is nobody's fault but their own.
ReplyDelete"I've been told that addictions can run in families...my own family would be a prime example of that being so. I don't know if it's true or not. "
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry, but I must agree with Ms. kittycat..My oldest son is an alcoholic..he started drinking at the age of 12..he's 29 now..His natural father died at the age of 41 from alcoholism..My son was never really around him much until he was older..I do believe it's a hereditary disease..at least that's what I've witnessed and have been learning over the years..
I used to work in D&A (drug and alcohol) and learned quite a lot about the use of drugs..
Do you know that the US is the only country that treats D&A as a non-health issue???..It's all jail and prison time here.
Oh Sweet Stanger;
ReplyDeleteI have repeatedly told my readers that i am no saint.
I did not mean by referring to their families, (mine included) that they were in anyway absolved of their own responsibilities to themselves or to their own families.
Nor did I mean it as a justification, which I now see how that could be interpreted.
You are right. It is nobodys fault but their own. You either choose to drink, or not to.
But in choosing to drink, it will always, somehow, complicate your heart, your head- and those of your family too.
XOXO
Me
ReplyDeleteSweet Wyck,
I cannot believe how devastating of a job that was for you. Personally I would be trying to cure everyone of everything...
I am sorry that your son lost his father at such a young age too. That has to hurt bad. (Again, NOT as justification in any way shape or form).
I have always said that it is stupid to take away keys/cars/freedom, etc of the DUI people.
But I have always added that I do not know what the answer is either.
I guess if anybody really did have the answer that they would be marketing it somehow...
XOXO
Me
Another justification? Excuse me. No way am I attempting to justify anything. I do believe I mentioned the fact that I take full responsibility for my actions. I also stated that it hit me before I realized what had happened.
ReplyDeleteI stand by my comment...addictions run in families. It's just the nature of the beast.
I don't know how true it is that addictions run in families. My dad is a functioning alcoholic, and my whole life I grew up watching how stupid he was for drinking. His whole family drinks as well. There is always beer and wine at family functions. I have gotten drunk maybe a dozen times in my life, and I really don't like it. (Most of that was from the 3 weeks I spent in Germany when I was 17). My little brother just turned 21, so we will see how he turns out in time I guess. Maybe I was just lucky enough to see what happens to an extreme enough to keep me from joining the club. When a grown man goes to the bathroom in the middle of the living room, talks about the little elves with the little red hats that live in the pictureframes but you can't see them, when he hugs you and tells you he loves you and half an hour later decides he wants to kill you, when he has your little brother drive the boat onto the trailer, and then decides to take off without securing the boat to the trailer and my brother still inside(age 10 here), when he can't find the hotel in Milwaukee after a rock concert and decides to drive severely drunk all the way to Chicago with two kids and a wife in a little GeoMetro at 2 am, you see what the negative effects of alcoholism are. It probably saved me from making a lot of bad decisions in my life. In that way, I thank my dad. I can only hope that he will one day decide he has a problem and try to get help.
ReplyDeleteSweet Cat;
ReplyDeleteI was replying only about Wycks son.
That comment should not have been taken to heart by you. You absolutely HAVE taken responsibility
XOXO
Me
Hi Sweetie;
ReplyDeleteI am SO sorry that you lived like this.
These kinds of stories are what makes my own blood run so damned cold...
I am thinking that your dad IS your saving grace in that respect.
What an awful way to tear up a family though; and I am sorry too that it continues for him even now.
But it did teach you much that you missed somehow- About 'family' and about a very 'gentle' kind of love- that, even as I type my grandson is benefiting from.
XOXO
Me
My eldest sis is an alcoholic. It took a horrendous car crash and a lot of family and friends' support, but she's been dry for almost 30 years now and I love her for it. She's the reason I rarely, if ever drink on my own at home. It's too easy to get into that 'open a bottle of wine, pour a couple of glasses, and then decide to finish it off', rut - instead of either sticking what's left of it in the fridge or pouring it down the plughole! I don't intend to go there! I've seen firsthand the damage it can cause.
ReplyDeleteAnne, I was responding to stangerdaze's comment, not yours.
ReplyDeleteI too saw ALL of the negative effects of alcoholism while growing up as did both of my younger brothers and yet all of us drank. My middle brother did check himself in to a detox center many long years ago...whether or not he's still sober I have no way of knowing as we're no longer in contact with each other. Youngest brother seems to have missed the alcohol demon. Sometimes it doesn't make any difference what you see as a child; you HAVE to go through it yourself to truly understand.
BTW, I was sober for 18 years before I took a drink. I've discovered that I can no longer drink beer as it's the one thing that will cause my ulcer to flare up. Two drinks is my limit when I do decide to drink which is seldom as I no longer enjoy the taste of anything...except Bailey's.
As I've said, I take full responsibility for myself, however addictions of all kinds do run in families.
I was not saying anything negative against you, nor was I insinuating that you were not taking responsibility for you actions. I do not know you, I make no such judgements. I was just displaying the opposite side of the story. I was stating my opinion that I wasn't convinced that just because your parents/family drink, you have to. Alcoholism runs in my family as well, and I have heard, far too many times how we are predisposed to it, how it is a gene, and that's supposed to somehow absolve them. Then with everything I've gone through (very recently) with my ex. I am just sick and tired of hearing excuses. As far as I am concerned there are none.
ReplyDeleteAnne, I am choosing to leave this thread. I hope you understand and don't take offense.
ReplyDeleteOXOXOX
me
Sweet Mrs. G.;
ReplyDeleteI am sorry that this has touched yourself so very personally too.
Yet, with great respect to your sister, there is so MUCH to be thankful for!
I never did drink alone, rarely at home either; as I much preferred to be in the company of friends.
But I do have liquor, beer, and the like in the house too.
And basically use it to cook with.
I am not a teetotaler though. A glass of wine if (and that's a big "IF"), I go out to s sit down dinner- Or a brandy old fashioned and sweet at a wedding reception.
I count myself fortunate to know my limitations. Now.
Hats off to your sister.
One of my own sisters is an alcoholic. I am guessing that her years of sobriety equal your own sisters.
Love to you
XOXO
Anne
Sweet Mrs. G.;
ReplyDeleteI am sorry that this has touched yourself so very personally too.
Yet, with great respect to your sister, there is so MUCH to be thankful for!
I never did drink alone, rarely at home either; as I much preferred to be in the company of friends.
But I do have liquor, beer, and the like in the house too.
And basically use it to cook with.
I am not a teetotaler though. A glass of wine if (and that's a big "IF"), I go out to s sit down dinner- Or a brandy old fashioned and sweet at a wedding reception.
I count myself fortunate to know my limitations. Now.
Hats off to your sister.
One of my own sisters is an alcoholic. I am guessing that her years of sobriety equal your own sisters.
Ain't life grand when it works out this way?!
Love to you
XOXO
Anne
ReplyDeleteSweet Cat;
I see.
Methinks you are both responding passionately to how alcohol has affected your own hearts and lives.
Now go call your brothers.
XOXO
Me
Sweet Stanger;
ReplyDeleteYour opinion is a good one. That you choose to share your heart is quite special too.
I have to agree, there are no excuses to tear up a family, save for utter ignorance in this day/age.
I feel for the people, quite like yourself, who have lost almost everything due to that same ignorance.
XOXO
Me
ReplyDeleteYour choice Sweetie.
You chose to come, and as always, you can also choose to leave.
But I do think that StangerDaze has made some excellent points as well.
I have never told anyone not to comment. Many have waited to see how everything plays out in my blogs before commenting. Some just jump right in.
As long as everyone understands that one day my grandbabies might be reading this, and never blatantly attacks one another here, all will be well.
And no profanity either.
I have yet to delete a comment, (or a friend), for anything less than disrespect.
No offense taken.
Come back anytime.
XOXO
Me