From my email...
Fully guaranteed to make someone mad. hehehe
Thank you Duane!
XOXO
Me
* * *
Dear Noah,
We could have sworn you said the ark wasn't leaving till 5.
Sincerely,
Unicorns
Thank you Duane!
XOXO
Me
* * *
Dear Noah,
We could have sworn you said the ark wasn't leaving till 5.
Sincerely,
Unicorns
***
Dear Skin-Colored Band Aids,
Please make one for every skin color.
Sincerely,
Black people
* * *
Dear Scissors,
I feel your pain...no one wants to run with me either.
Sincerely,
Sarah Palin
* * *
Dear Customers,
Dear Skin-Colored Band Aids,
Please make one for every skin color.
Sincerely,
Black people
* * *
Dear Scissors,
I feel your pain...no one wants to run with me either.
Sincerely,
Sarah Palin
* * *
Dear Customers,
Yes, we ARE making fun of you in Vietnamese.
Sincerely,
Nail Salon Ladies
Sincerely,
Nail Salon Ladies
* * *
Dear Ugly People,
You're welcome.
Sincerely,
Alcohol
* * *
Dear World,
Please stop freaking out about 2012. Our calendars end there because some
Spanish d-bags invaded our country and we got a little busy ok?
Sincerely,
The Mayans
* * *
Dear White People,
Don't you just hate immigrants?
Sincerely,
Native Americans
* * *
Dear iPhone,
Please stop spell checking all of my rude words into nice words. You piece of shut.
Sincerely,
Every iPhone User
* * *
Dear Trash,
At least you get picked up...
Sincerely,
The Girls of Jersey Shore
* * *
Dear Man,
It's cute, but can you pick up peanuts with it?
Sincerely,
Elephant
* * *
Dear Icebergs,
Sorry to hear about the global warming. Karma's a b!tch.
Sincerely,
The Titanic
* * *
Dear America ,
You produced Miley Cyrus. Bieber is your punishment.
Sincerely,
Canada
* * *
Dear Yahoo,
I've never heard anyone say, "I don't know, let's Yahoo! it..." Just saying...
Sincerely,
* * *
Dear 2010,
So I hear the best rapper is white and the president is black? WTF happened?!
Sincerely,
1985
* * *
Dear Twilight fans,
Please realize that because vampires are dead and have no blood pumping through them, they can never get an erection. Enjoy fantasizing about that.
Sincerely,
Logic
* * *
Hope everyone is smiling!
... and if not, please get over yourself.
Too, too funny!!!
ReplyDeleteoxox,
snotball
lmao
ReplyDeletelmao! those are good! :)
ReplyDeleteEven though I've received the self same email, these are still funny on a second reading! xx
ReplyDeleteI smiled at them all!
ReplyDeleteBut....the one that really made me almost spit out my teeth was the elephant to the man comparing his trunk to the mans....well....you know the rest! Hehehehehe!
Thank you, you wonderful 5 friends of mine!
ReplyDeleteI have had 23 people read this, and only you 5 had the nerve to reply.
That said, I had best look at why the rest of you might have chosen not to giggle, even at one of them.
WTH is that all about? Perhaps it is time to deal with my long list of ahem, "contacts" (You know, the ones with busted fingers)..
Ya think?
XOXO
Me
The word... is "junk"???
ReplyDeletehehehe
I actually had an equal number of replies from my email list.
ReplyDeleteGo figure...
And after you have figured it out, go have yourselves a "Wunnaful" Labor Day weekend!
XOXO
Me
some of us were on our phones and could neither read nor comment..... but came back today.
ReplyDelete
ReplyDeleteLove you more! (Larss too).
XOXO
Me
XOXOOXOXOXO
ReplyDeleteLMFAO...
ReplyDeleteThey all made me giggle.
What does that say about me?
Hee hee!
Loved them...lol Some folks just too tight a**ed to admit they giggled too!
ReplyDeleteI just loved this. And alot of it just might be true. Glad I stopped by. You never fail me My Friend
ReplyDeleteHad to come back for another smile. LOL.
ReplyDeleteoxox,
snotball
"deeannes
ReplyDeletereply
deeannes wrote on Sep 1
some of us were on our phones and could neither read nor comment..... but came back today."
I never saw it at all, so what category do you put me into??? I had to go into your name as a contact & check your recent posts to see it at all. These are ALL very funny, & I can't see why they'd make anyone mad!
This one just has to be my favourite, as vampire fans know why!
"Dear Twilight fans,
Please realize that because vampires are dead and have no blood pumping through them, they can never get an erection. Enjoy fantasizing about that.
Sincerely,
Logic"
Oh, how I LOVE logic! ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥