September 15th, 2006 -Daniel DeGrave

September 15th, 2006  -Daniel DeGrave

Happy 25th Birthday, Daniel...

and yes, this is the definition of a bittersweet birthday.
You have now turned 25-
an entire quarter of a century; and have just lost your sister...

Find your peace in knowing she is with you always...

And Good Evening to all of my friends- and to the 'lurkers' too- all of whom have taken a moment of your own time to send a note of sincere condolences our way-

BTW, Daniel is on the far right of this photo...

It has been a wretched few days here... No sleep, (very little anyway), even with getting a shot for my stupid head yesterday. It seems as everything is either going too fast- or in slow motion; and I don't know why.

My HP PSC500 failed me this morning as I tried to make copies of all the photos I had of Reianna... And of all times for that to go- The scanner doesn't work at all- says it's not connected etc etc etc... (Uh-huh).

So I 'made' photos by copying them- They will all be on Reianna's Memorial Boards then. --Changing computers in January, I never did re-hook up my old computer to retrieve all of those pictures... I will do that one day soon-

But for now, what I have for Susan and Dennis and Daniel will have to suffice.

I brought Sue's copies to her home today- Dennis, Daniel and David will be here in the A.M. to help Casey move- Dennis can have his then... Think I will put them in an album too so they do not get misplaced. But, oh!, what a job to make all the reprints this way. OK, so NOW I have also run out of photo paper...

I found myself running the entire gamut of emotion since Wednesdays phone call, and as I sorted through all of the pictures today- Some of those making me cry, and wanting it all back- Some of them honestly making me laugh out loud from the memory of it all.

Picture this: 6 kids in a teeny little old Datsun! Yes, they all fit- Of course that was before all the new car seat laws- (I think you have to have them in a car seat until they are 25 or so nowadays)! That was also before I had bought my then new 1985 Buick Electra Estate Wagon- with the 3rd seat! (They would argue over whose turn it was to sit back there).
Once there, they would make faces at all the cars behind us...
And we would sing- LOUDLY- wherever we would be going to...

We still are not entirely sure why God chose to take Reianna- She died about noon on Wednesday- The autopsy is not yet finished, so that, in and of itself, dictates when the funeral can be. He said that the private viewing will definitely be Sunday, with the service to be held then on Monday- Long weekend for everyone.

And if for no other reason than to get everyone busy, I am glad that Casey and Roberta are moving tomorrow. They will have a little place in Pulaski, and with everyone pitching in to move, it shouldn't be taking them too long at all. (Which is NOT to say that CaseyAnne is all packed either)!

Roberta is moving everything she can tonight- Casey has already brought a bunch of stuff over- She still has to take that whole dorm bed/desk/dresser thingie apart- (I say leave it for the guys to do)!

I sat down on the floor the other night- everybody had been here- and was gone again- And just cried and cried. You just miss people so much more now, especially when you know you will never be able to see them again. Death does that not to the decedent, but only to those of us left behind. But my little Miss Punk came to me, sat down and gently laid her head against me as if to say it would be alright. Oh, my Faith assures me that it will. But surely this will take much time.

Reianna has left behind 3 small children- There are no words to say how my heart breaks for them all- The youngest is only 9 months old...

When I met Reianna, she was so quiet and shy- but came out of that quickly enough once she realized that she would be getting a whole bunch of sisters out of the whole deal! She loved to come out here- And loved my Mom so very much- And I can remember the time that she asked Mom if it was OK to call her 'Grandma'? My mother (almost brought to tears at that point)- said, "Of course you may! One can never have too many grandmothers!" Those two always had to share their birthday cakes too- Fun to watch them try to blow out the candles- And with that is yet another small consolation as I know that Reianna and my mother are together once more!

Reianna always made people so happy to be near to her.

We used to walk back to the woods a whole lot in those days- Each child would see something new each time- (sometimes with every step)...

 Once though, it was March- a thaw had come- everything was pretty muddy- I chose not to go with them-
Zoe, being the oldest, would watch them close enough; and besides they all knew where they could go/not go anyway...
About 45 minutes later, we had a whole houseful of hysterical children- laughing, crying (and everything inbetween too)...

...Seems as though they had taken a shortcut across the field. Half of them had come back with their boots- half of them only with their dirty soaking wet socks-
They had gotten stuck in the mud so bad that they couldn't even pull their boots out!
(I think it was a full 2 years later that Farmer Fisher finally plowed those boots up)!

Yes, we had plenty of fun- a few of the normal trials and tribulations of children growing up, but nothing that should have led to death at 27... Too young- and she had so much to do yet...

For now though I am going to try to get a bit of sleep- Am so tired, inside and out. It goes all the way through- and it cuts way deep sometimes...

I hope everyone is having brighter and lighter days than we are at this point. Have a good weekend.

And may God Bless you all for your kind thoughts, words of encouragement, and all of your offered prayers-

XOXO,
Anne

Friday September 15, 2006 - 09:24pm (CDT)